The Missing Manual of Unwritten Laws: PART 2

You dishonor yourself if you let anyone ghostwrite any aspect of your story. “More” is not a goal, yet its elusive appeal contains hope and happiness. Grief unspoken will seek another language of the body or heart. Each moment we actively construct what we think,...

The Missing Manual of Unwritten Laws: PART 1

What remains unconscious will be attributed to fate. The most important problems cannot be solved—they have to be outgrown. Your life is a self-statement, the manifestation of what exists inside you. If you find yourself denying change, it has already occurred....

Empathic Derailment

No, Krueger, first you have to be with me before I can go someplace new with you. —A psychoanalytic patient many years ago accurately confronting me with moving too quickly into a dynamic interpretation before establishing empathic resonance to communicate...

Empathy: The Bridge to Common Ground

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant? —Henry David Thoreau How can you recognize what never before has been considered? See what you don’t believe? Discover what you don’t even know to look for? Discern that...

Money and the Shame/Self-Esteem Axis

Of all human emotions, the most painful, the hardest to tolerate is shame. Shame is the feeling that there is something wrong with us, that we are not only inadequate, but basically flawed. Shame can assume different intensities from embarrassment to humiliation. When...

The Secret Playbook: 32 Paradoxes and 6 Antipodes

Paradoxes To require that others respond to you exactly as you want gives them control over you. To influence others to respond in the specific way that you want renders them inauthentic in your mind. Acceptance is not acquiescence. It is rare to see fully all that...